Another episode from Mick's fledgling work The Philosophy Of Love And Laughter - a work in progress. He's getting all Beatrix Potter in his old age, the daft get.
So the word on the street was that a pet rabbit had gone rogue. The gossip gathering over Thackley was of a small, young, fast and very smart doe that no one could get near. It was never a first hand report but always 'Blah-blah sez that….’ Might be a ghost or fevered imaginations.
Rumours exaggerate and spread faster than Usain Bolt on a travelator round ’ere, especially when it’s something as exciting as a pet rabbit breaking out to fight for its Leporidaen rights.
Everyone in Thackley knows it’s happened before, there’s sommat that rabbits like to do and all you have to do is look at the wild rabbits around the farms and common ground. The variation in size and colouring attests to the brave, pet rabbit freedom fighters of the past. We should make a plaque and lay dandelion leaves once a year to honour them.
We’d not seen the insurgent doe - so I let the rumour ride - but we had witnessed packs of frantic people across the road, moving fast, arms out, bent at the middle, shouting and trying to co-ordinate. Has to be a rabbit, a very scared and, counting the people, very astute, agile rabbit.
Confirmation of the rogue rabbit emerged when Vicky and her sister came in, hot and flustered, they needed to sit down, catch their breath. ‘Spotted the shadow rabbit, middle of the road, slip of a thing, tried to catch her, too fast. We could only get within two feet of her from either side and she was gone. Like a ghost, just disappeared.'
So she was real but too fast, too slippery and, by the sounds of it, way too clever… I was taking notes.